So this morning, Chet woke me saying, "it's 6:30" just after i dreamt that the 5 of us had just jumped on a train with only ourselves (as if we were homeless) and were kicked off by the other vagabonds already there.
I acknowledged him and evidently went back to sleep because I had this horrific dream:
I woke up on a bench seat, much like that of an older train but it was outside and i am not sure if i was on a train or just at the station. I groggily looked up and saw a blue denim backpack with flowers on the front sitting in a seat on the train located in front of me and thought, "Hey that looks like ours" then i saw Emma's little blue backpack we use as a diaper bag, then in the seat across, a couple of our duffle bags, and Aden's camo bag for his diabetes supplies. I looked around for Chet and the kids but didn't see them. I freaked out internally..."do i stay here and wait for them?"..."do i get on the train and stay with our things?"..."do i get on the train and go looking for them?"..."where could they be?"..."Why didn't Chet or Seth stay with the stuff?"..."Did something happen to them?"
I decided that if they were still on the train and i took the stuff and waited for them on the platform, Aden and Emma wouldn't have their insulin or bottles (respectively). And that someone needed to stay with the stuff so it didn't get taken or thrown off the train so, I got on and sat in a seat with the stuff; the whole time, looking for my family.
Then, a couple got on and sat ON our stuff, literally ON it! Underneath them were 2 duffle bags and Aden's camo bag. I asked them to give me my stuff back and they said, "this is our stuff." We argued back and forth for a while until i said, "I don't care if you have the duffle bags but the camo bag is my son's insulin and he needs it. Please give it back." They did and i sat down still wondering where everyone was.
The train started moving and i started freaking out even more..."Surely they will come to their seats now"..."or maybe they were in the bathroom - you would think they would be out by now."..."or something has gone horribly wrong." I started crying because i didn't know where they were and Aden didn't have his insulin. I rode all the way to somewhere (the next stop) bawling and no one caring why. I got off with all our stuff (minus the duffle bags) and started wandering aimlessly - still sobbing.
Then i woke, in my bed, between Chet and Emma...asked Chet to hold me and just started crying. He held me for a long time while i cried and told him this dream, reassuring me that I wont loose them and they aren't going anywhere. I *know* that but i am left trying to interpret this dream...
6 years ago